Balance

How to find balance in 3 easy steps

Everyone is looking for balance, but no one seems to ever find it. This is for a perfectly good reason. Most people’s concept of an unwavering balance does not exist.

Think about it. Have you ever gone to the doctor and stood on one of those old-school scales? Of course, you did. We all have. The nurse wiggles the little weight around until the rod floats evenly in the tiny box. Shift, even a bit and the whole thing tips and bounces. What if I told you to remain so still that the rod never touches for eternity? You’d think I was crazy.

It would take enormous energy to stay in such still and perfect balance, energy that couldn’t be allocated to making moves forward.

You’d be paralyzed and should you remain there, lose weight and tip the scale anyway!
Uninterrupted, perpetual, perfect balance is not a real thing! Please read that again. It’s a lie you are being sold by every “life coach” out there and one that will keep you anxiously chasing the white rabbit until you let it go. I tell you this trade secret in hopes it will relax your expectations of yourself and destroy this unrealistic notion. Then, and only then, you may find yourself on the way to a truer, attainable form of life balance. Here are some easy steps to finding more balance in your life.

1. Define what balance means to you!

We have more self-help books, memos, memes, and trainings now than ever before in history and yet many feel the most stressed and imbalanced ever. This comes from wrong information which leads to debilitating expectations.

You have to focus on what balance means to YOU or no matter what you do, you will never feel you successfully achieved it.

Don’t try to be anyone else. Some people can work 80 hour weeks and feel totally in balance. Others need sleep and gym time to feel even and some need recreation, family time, travel. It’s all up to you what your balanced life looks like and you have to define it to know it or you’ll be constantly searching for something you can’t describe. Believe me, if you can’t explain it in words you will never ever know it when you have it.

Tracking is everything! Join the My Bliss Book community to access my weekly balance sheet and define what balance means to you!

2. Think long term

We are shifting all the time. We adjust for friends, family, work, environment, spirituality, health. Sometimes we go way in one direction because our full focus and attention are needed there.

Balance isn’t a state to maintain; it’s a state to be aware of.

In a lifetime, what are two non-stop work years? Sometimes that happens. Often they are followed by play years. Sometimes we have children and there are children years. Those years aren’t balanced and the stress people have trying to find that impossible state is worse than the imbalance they feel. Keep your mind focused on your Big Bliss Picture and revel in the period you are in rather than try to change things to fit some cliche standard. In your Big Bliss Picture everything is in balance. Remember when you are feeling imbalanced, that you are headed there!

3. Be wholly where you are

As I hope you’ve figured out, balance is largely an illusion. The best way to capture the illusion is to reduce fragmentation and be absolutely where you are.

The reason we feel so imbalanced as a culture these days is because we have trained ourselves to always think we should be somewhere else.

We have to re-train our brains to engage fully in the present moment. This takes some discipline. Each week take a look at your calendar and segment your day into clear sections. Those can be hourly or even shorter. Put exactly what you will focus on in each section and do nothing but that thing during that time. Practice both stretching your length of concentration on a single topic and becoming aware of tasks you are better at during different times in the day.

Notice the types and lengths of breaks which enrich you verses those which cause you to be unfocused when you try to re-engage. Adjust accordingly when you make your next plan, but be strict with yourself while you are in the middle of the plan at hand. Do not let yourself let a friend distract you during work time or check emails during friend time. Do social media only during dedicated social media time. Do not let cravings, addictions, and other people’s desires rule your time. Notice how you feel after two weeks. You will absolutely feel more balanced and realise you are in control over how you spend your time.

Pro-tip:

Feeling lacking in one area in your life? The time is always NOW to make that different. Need sleep? Take a 10-minute nap… now. Missing a loved one? Call… now. Lacking creativity, education, inspiration? Sign up for that class… now. Or break out some crayons, and take a 15-minute doodle break with some music.

Don’t wait for the perfect moment to make the move toward balance. The best time is always the present.

Are you a Bliss Booker?!

Bliss Bookers get free downloads and bi-weekly emails on topics such as balance, focus, and crushing goals. Order your MY BLISS BOOK today and I’ll send you my free balance wheel so you can get started right away!

Color it in based on YOUR dream use of your time, then do one weekly for the next 4 weeks to see how you are actually spending your time. Hint: You’ll have to keep EVERYTHING you do logged into your calendar. You can even color code there for a digital look at how you spend your time.

Download the Balance PDF

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